Things2Remember

R.S.V.P. ON TIME

 R.S.V.P. on a given time  before the red-letter date. So when you get one, don’t stash the reply card out of sight, thinking, “I have tons of time.” Do that, and you’ll probably forget all about it. Here’s why timely R.S.V.P.s are a big deal: Vendors require a final head count a few weeks ahead of time to make sure there’s enough seating and food available. Sneak in your R.S.V.P. past the deadline, and you’re making several people scramble last-minute to accommodate you.

NEVER ADD YOUR OWN PLUS-ONE

Every couple goes through a painstaking process of deciding how many people they can have at their wedding. So if yours is the only name that appears on the envelope, then you are the only one invited, period. If the couple intends for you to bring along a date, the envelope will read “...and Guest.”

On KIDS..And Wedding

Because it’s considered bad etiquette, a couple usually won’t flat-out write “adults only” on their invites. Instead, the common sense is on you to interpret the wording on the envelope. If it’s addressed to “The Doe Family” on the outside, or if the names of you and your children are listed individually on the inner envelope, you are free to roll with an entourage. If not, hire a babysitter and leave the tykes at home.

ARRIVE ON TIME

 

Making an entrance after the bride is not acceptable. Plan to be in your seat 30 minutes before official showtime. If there is an unforeseen obstacle preventing you from getting to the ceremony on time -- heavy traffic, late babysitter, wardrobe  malfunction (they do happen!) -- never interrupt a ceremony service or a wedding program.

LOOK THE PART

 

A formal or casual dress code is self-explanatory. And a note for the ladies: No matter the day’s fashion guidelines, use common sense when choosing footwear for an event.

WAIT TO BE SEATED

 

Most ceremonies reserve the first rows of seating for the bridal party, immediate family, and grandparents. So unless you’re one of them, look to the ushers for guidance.

BE A TEAM PLAYER

 

 Is everyone expected to join in on the first dance? Boogie on up. In accepting the couple’s invitation, you’re implying that you’re down with whatever they throw your way. They’ve no doubt been dreaming of this day for a long time -- your happiness and accommodating attitude will help make it just as wonderful as they imagined.

DRINK RESPONSIBLY

Not to get all PSA on you, but drinking to ridiculous excess isn’t just unbecoming, it’s dangerous, especially if you haven’t lined up a ride home beforehand. When the bride and groom provide an open bar, they’re providing a courtesy. A great way to show gratitude: Pace yourself so you can continue to toast the happy couple well into the wee hours of the morn.

BE CONSIDERATE OF THE VENUE

Once the bubbly has been busted out and the DJ cranks up the tunes, it can be easy to forget you’re partying on rented property. To score the space, the couple took on the responsibility of keeping it intact by signing a contract and paying a deposit. It’s up to everyone in attendance to make sure they get their money back. Also, don’t take anything from the venue home (it happens more than you think!). Even the centerpieces on the tables may be created with items that need to be returned postfestivities.